Thursday, September 08, 2011

The Story of Snow White and the Seven Dwarves and R2-D2
As requested by a four-and-a-half-year-old: "Yeah, tell me that one.  Snow White.  And put R2-D2 in it. And R2-D2 has to use his cannon."

Once upon a time, in a land far, far away, lived a young princess named Snow White.  She was called Snow White because of her pale white skin.  Her mother was dead, and her father was the king.  One day her father remarried, and the new queen did not like Snow White.  After a while it was clear that Snow White was just in her way.  Snow White's best friend and trusty companion was R2-D2 the droid.

Then when Snow White was about sixteen, her father, the king, died suddenly.  He left his kingdom to his daughter, but the step-mother intervened and ran things.  She made evil choices that made the people of the kingdom work harder, and give more of their money to the queen, and go hungry.  Snow White did not like this.  Nor did R2-D2.

One day, R2-D2 was rolling along a castle corridor, when, with his fine droid sensors, he heard a conversation between the Evil Queen and a woodcutter.  The Evil Queen was saying:  "I can't take it any more.  Snow White is criticizing my treatment of the rabble, and some of my ministers are agreeing with her.  You must kill her when she's out in the forest today.  Say that wolves got her."

R2-D2 went immediately to Snow White, of course, and warned her.  He recommended that Snow White should escape the castle, to avoid being killed.  Meanwhile R2-D2 would call in his friend the Prince from another country, who would come and help them deal with the Evil Queen.  R2-D2 explained to Snow White how she could find the Seven Dwarves, who lived together and would hide her until it was safe to return to the castle.

Snow White went out into the forest earlier than usual and evaded the woodcutter. She found the Seven Dwarves' cottage, and asked for their help.  Of course they agreed and said she could stay.  The Seven Dwarves were Grumpy, Sleepy, Sneezy, Doc, Nosey, Geeky, and Skip.  Each day they went away to work in the mines, and came back in the evening.  Snow White started to help out by cleaning up after breakfast, and preparing a nice supper for when they came back, so the Seven Dwarves grew to love her indeed.

The Evil Queen knew that Snow White was now hiding, so she came up with a different plan.  She used magic to disguise herself as a poor old woman selling apples.  She put one special apple in her basket, just for Snow White; it had poison. She went around the area of the castle, asking if anybody had seen a pretty young girl, new in the area.  Eventually she found a village where some people had noticed a pretty young girl who had recently started living with the Seven Dwarves, and so she went to investigate.  She found Snow White, all alone in the middle of the day.

"Hello, my deary", she said.  "Would you like to buy some apples?"

"Oh, those look delicious," Snow White answered.  "But I have no money, I'm sorry."

"Well, you're such a pretty dear, " the Evil Witch disguised as a poor old woman said, "I'll give you this apple if you give me the pleasure of eating it.  An old woman like me doesn't enjoy life as much as you young folks, so I'll just take a break and watch you eat this apple."  And she handed Snow White the apple prepared with poison.  

Snow White took a bite of the apple and before she even finished chewing it, she swooned.  That means, she fell over, right onto the ground, as if asleep -- or dead.  The Evil Queen laughed and went back to the castle, convinced that Snow White was dead.

Meanwhile, don't forget, R2-D2 had sent a message to his friend, the Prince from another country.  It took a long time in those days for a message to get to the other country, and for the Prince to ride to Snow White's country.  The Prince was just arriving when R2-D2 heard the news the Evil Queen was spreading -- that Snow White was not just missing, but found dead, and that the Evil Queen was going to rule the country.

R2-D2 rolled out to meet the Prince.  When the two friends found each other on the road, R2-D2 led the Prince to the Seven Dwarves cottage.  The Seven Dwarves had just arrived, and were moaning sadly about poor Snow White.

With his sensors, R2-D2 could tell that Snow White was just breathing very slightly, only barely alive.  In droid speak (doot dweet peep brrrrr peep peep doot) he instructed the Prince to lift Snow White onto the table so that R2-D2 could use his gripper arm to open Snow White's mouth.  R2-D2 found pieces of apple in her mouth, because she hadn't even finished swallowing the apple, so he took them out.  Then he instructed the Prince in how to sit Snow White up to whack her back, to dislodge more pieces of apple.  Together, they got enough of the poison apple out of Snow White so that she could recover.

The next day, Snow White, the Prince, and R2-D2 headed to the castle.  Snow White took a bow and arrows just in case, and the Prince had his sword.  When they arrived at the castle, the gates were locked and the Evil Queen was instructing the guards not to let them in.

"She's not the real Snow White! She's an impostor! Keep her out of the castle!" she yelled to the guards.

"I am the real Snow White!" Snow White shouted back.  "You guards, you know me.  I grew up in this castle!"  And the did know her, so some of them put down their swords, and their bows and arrows.  The Evil Queen grabbed one of them and tried to threaten his life with her dagger, so he would obey her, so Snow White shot a warning arrow.  The Evil Queen had to hide from the arrows so she let the guards go.

The gate was still locked, so R2-D2 used his cannon to blast it open.  Boom!  The gate crashed open, and the threesome walked into the castle through the gate.  But the Evil Queen was waiting for them, and she tried to jump on Snow White and kill her with a dagger.  Luckily, the Prince was ready with his sword, and he swung it to protect Snow White, and cut off the Evil Queen's head.

Snow White thanked the Prince for saving her, although she said "You shouldn't have killed her.  We should have brought the Evil Queen to justice and put her in prison.".

"I know," said the Prince, "But it was an accident.  It was in defense."

"That's true," said Snow White.  "Say, you seem like a nice guy.  How about you stay here with me?  I'm going to rule this kingdom, and do a much better job than the Evil Queen, too.  If you give me good advice, and help me rule this kingdom, maybe we could get married. "

"That sounds like a good idea," said the Prince.

R2-D2 said "Peeeeep doot dweet-deet doot brrrrr peep!"

And they all lived happily ever after.


Stephie said...

Just going to point out a typo--"barely arrive" should be "barely alive."

If only removing poison were so easy! Awesome story.

Lisa said...


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